I enjoyed the ATL weekend with everyone so very much. It was refreshing, rejuvenating... just the thing. I miss it already, but I know that we all are in our separate places for good reasons. For me, I think it's mostly because God has things to teach me.
I've learned a lot this year about the darker places in myself that I have always swept into the corner. I'm not who I want to be, and I certainly can't handle things on my own. I desperately need Jesus. Always have, always will. I have always wanted to make myself into someone worthy of approval. While I may believe differently theologically, functionally I've been trying to accumulate my own righteousness for a long time. Essentially, I've been trying to convince everyone else (and myself) that I was good. God's tearing it all down, reminding me that a religion of self-improvement is oppositional to the message of the Gospel. The Gospel says, "You're a mess, but let ME fix YOU." It's not telling me, "You're a mess, let me get you started and then you fix you." Though it may be a humbling experience--this 101 in realizing the depths of my sin--it certainly is one that leads to greater freedom and peace, because you realize He loved you first. And He still loves you, before you get any "better."
Today, we went floating down the river in pouring down rain. It's super high right now, and honestly it was a little dangerous. SO FUN. I love how nature makes you feel so small and yet so connected to God. I miss that about being at Covenant- the fact that you could go escape to a bluff all by yourself, or with a few friends, and be instantly speechless because of the incredible work of God. At the same time, it feels so right to be where we are. It's good to be out of school. (Well, okay... I teach... so I'm not really out of school :D ) It's good to feel inadequate and see the faithfulness of God in the midst of the mess that you are. Life's a beautiful mess. I cannot wait to see the masterpiece that God has been weaving.
Well. I love you all. God is good and He has intentionally planned where you are even now. He loves you personally- not just collectively with His people. (Galatians 2:20- personal pronouns!) Be encouraged by the One who loved us while we were yet enemies.
-April
Sunday, July 7, 2013
Monday, July 1, 2013
Love and sing and wonder
John-Michael and I drove away from the McMichael home on Sunday after about half of the group had left. I scrambled out before we'd completed our three-point turn heading out of Briarmeade to say a quick last good-bye to April and Jo. We could then settle into our 1:43-hour trip home... and the "post-good-time blues" (which quickly subsided as we got used to being together, just us, again. Nice!).
We reflected on the weekend the whole way home, and how it's really and truly something we don't experience often...
thought about good conversations where a group of us would really listen and ask good questions, like Jonathan's teaching us about transportation, Clark and me looking at different sides of healthcare reform, hearing about Mexico from Katelyn, and occupational therapy research projects from Jane and Tim, John-Michael's online business plan, physics grad school climate from David... to name a few. We felt so loved!
thought about how good and filling it was to rest and play with each other
how refreshing it was to have a fast from technology, which is fitting because we were all there together anyway, but is unusual at least in our circles lately
the immense blessing of hospitality of Ms. McMichael
the witty humor (and not sarcasm) of our guys--kind, and not biting
Let us love and sing and wonder
Let us praise the Savior’s name
He has hushed the law’s loud thunder
He has quenched Mount Sinai’s flame
He has washed us with His blood
He has brought us nigh to God
Let us praise and join the chorus
Of the saints enthroned on high
Here they trusted Him before us
Now their praises fill the sky
Thou hast washed us with Thy blood
Thou art worthy Lamb of God
On a businessy-related note, I'm hoping we can use this as a way to communicate as a "friend unit". As Jonathan mentioned in the hot seat time, we could use this as a way to hold each other accountable in the grace to which God has called us. And of course we can post what's going on--pictures, poems, stories, works of art. I want us all to be able to post as admins, so I'll be working on setting this up. April can help. :-) Love to you all!
Under the mercy,
hannah
We reflected on the weekend the whole way home, and how it's really and truly something we don't experience often...
thought about good conversations where a group of us would really listen and ask good questions, like Jonathan's teaching us about transportation, Clark and me looking at different sides of healthcare reform, hearing about Mexico from Katelyn, and occupational therapy research projects from Jane and Tim, John-Michael's online business plan, physics grad school climate from David... to name a few. We felt so loved!
thought about how good and filling it was to rest and play with each other
how refreshing it was to have a fast from technology, which is fitting because we were all there together anyway, but is unusual at least in our circles lately
the immense blessing of hospitality of Ms. McMichael
the witty humor (and not sarcasm) of our guys--kind, and not biting
Let us love and sing and wonder
Let us praise the Savior’s name
He has hushed the law’s loud thunder
He has quenched Mount Sinai’s flame
He has washed us with His blood
He has brought us nigh to God
Let us praise and join the chorus
Of the saints enthroned on high
Here they trusted Him before us
Now their praises fill the sky
Thou hast washed us with Thy blood
Thou art worthy Lamb of God
On a businessy-related note, I'm hoping we can use this as a way to communicate as a "friend unit". As Jonathan mentioned in the hot seat time, we could use this as a way to hold each other accountable in the grace to which God has called us. And of course we can post what's going on--pictures, poems, stories, works of art. I want us all to be able to post as admins, so I'll be working on setting this up. April can help. :-) Love to you all!
Under the mercy,
hannah
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